2015 Cadillac Escalade review: The fellowship of the bling

It was 1963 when blues musician Tony Glover found a song manuscript lay on the table at his friend’s apartment. He skimmed through the lyrics: "Come senators, congressmen, please heed the call/Don't stand in the doorway, don't block up the hall..." Glover didn’t buy it, and turned to Bob Dylan and laid forth his concern about the track being too anthemic.

Bob was unfazed. He knew what the people wanted.

Today, it has become evident that people don’t want hefty SUVs. The period where Cadillac could sell 60,000 Escalades a year is over, with buyers opting for smaller, more versatile forms of transportation. The reworked 2015 Cadillac Escalade has helped boost sales somewhat, but with the past few years hovering at around 1,000 units per month, Dylan’s theory translates here too: There’s young blood in town, and times are now different.

Given the minor reworkings on the new Escalade, it’s as if Cadillac knows this too. You can’t turn Jaws into a goldfish, so why try? The market for three-ton, body-on-frame megatrucks is dwindling, but it does still exist. And the Escalade nametag holds weight. Sales targets may have shifted somewhat, but it’s the one car in the brand’s lineup that remains clearly defined.

I drove the new rig 1,500 miles to Michigan’s Upper Peninsula and back. Prior to my trip, a neighbor asked me who buys Cadillacs these days. He presumed it remains a brand for old men – ones that remember Bob’s anthem hitting the charts in ’65, no doubt. But the Escalade: “That’s for younger folk,” he said. “Rappers, probably.”

Yes, it’s hideously stereotypical, but it does show that the ATS and CTS haven’t fully escaped the orbit of those who favor whitewall tires and vinyl roofs. Meanwhile, the Escalade is still thought of as flashy truck that makes a statement. Which is precisely what it is.

Driving the big SUV feels similar to the outgoing model. At 420 hp, the 6.2-liter V-8 shared with the Corvette arrives to produce a tad more power and better efficiency — thanks to clever tricks like cylinder deactivation. And while it boasts an EPA-rated 21 mpg on the highway, in reality, you’ll spend most of your time in the mid-to-upper teens. But you will now sprint to 60 mph in less than six seconds.