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Police Departments Love To Post 'Graphic Design Is My Passion' Photos Of Their Cruisers

Photo: Colorado State Police
Photo: Colorado State Police

Apparently, the American Association of State Troopers is holding a contest to determine the coolest cruiser in the country, and the 13 cars the bootlickers who actually vote in this dumb contest like most will end up in a cop calendar.

Our friend over at CarScoops tipped us off about the contest, and looking through some of the submissions, it’s clear that many of these departments tried. It’s just that the people setting up and taking the photos have taste that runs a little “graphic design is my passion.” Let’s take a look at some of the best of the worst from various states.

Alabama

Photo: Alabama Law Enforcement Agency
Photo: Alabama Law Enforcement Agency

As we all know, the USS Alabama plays a very important role in making sure speeders are ticketed.

Colorado

Photo: Colorado State Patrol
Photo: Colorado State Patrol

Clearly, they needed the horses to showcase how much horsepower their patrol car has. Mustang connection? What Mustang connection?

Arkansas

Photo: Arkansas State Police
Photo: Arkansas State Police

You see, it’s actually one car, but it looks like there’s a second, upside-down car because the light reflects in the puddle.

Connecticut

Photo: Arkansas State Police
Photo: Arkansas State Police

How much do you think it cost taxpayers to include the helicopter in this otherwise total snooze of a photo? $5,000?

Delaware

Photo: Delaware State Police
Photo: Delaware State Police

You can’t really see what’s going on in this photo because no one actually knows what’s going on in Delaware ever. Nice full moon, though.

Florida

Photo: Florida Highway Patrol
Photo: Florida Highway Patrol

I’m not saying this is Photoshopped, but maybe submit a photo next time that doesn’t look so Photoshopped.

Kansas

Photo: Kansas Highway Patrol
Photo: Kansas Highway Patrol

I’m pretty sure 19-year-olds use this exact spot for engagement photos ahead of yet another rustic, farm-themed wedding.

Maryland

Photo: Maryland State Patrol
Photo: Maryland State Patrol

This just in: Maryland cops support gambling and animal abuse. Hopefully, the short king on the horse got paid for his time.

Massachusetts

Photo: Massachusetts State Police
Photo: Massachusetts State Police

Sorry, this slideshow would have been done sooner, but I fell asleep just looking at this photo. Also, Massachusetts beaches are trash.

Michigan

Photo: Michigan State Police
Photo: Michigan State Police

You can definitely tell what they were going for, but maybe they shouldn’t have taken the photo with an iPhone 7.

Nebraska

Photo: Nebraska State Patrol
Photo: Nebraska State Patrol

That storm definitely looks big, but could they not have gotten out to shoot the car in front of a real tornado? I feel like that would have really taken this one to the next level.

Nevada

Photo: Nevada State Police
Photo: Nevada State Police

Somehow, despite there being two cars in this photo, the actual shot is maybe 20 percent car at most. I’m not sure if that’s going to be enough to make history or leave a legacy.

New Mexico

Photo: New Mexico State Police
Photo: New Mexico State Police

All the details are washed out, they’re wasting taxpayer dollars again with the helicopter, but balloons! Does anyone else think they look like they’re just Photoshopped in? I mean, they’re definitely Photoshopped, right?

Tennessee

Photo: Tennessee State Patrol
Photo: Tennessee State Patrol

Fun fact: This photo was taken during the fourth quarter of the UGA-Tennessee game. I guess when you’re looking at your seventh loss to Georgia in a row, there really isn’t a reason to stay until the end.

Virginia

Photo: Virginia State Police
Photo: Virginia State Police

It’s a photo. Of a police car. I’d say they tried, but let’s be honest here — they realized they forgot about the deadline to submit and ran outside at the last minute to at least get something.

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