The Cybertruck Is Hungry For (Engineer) Hands

Photo: Tesla
Photo: Tesla

The Tesla Cybertruck is fully willing to eat your fingers, should you put them under the wrong part of its hard-edged hood. This specific diet is due to its design, where viability as a species is exchanged for specific looks and traits. The Cybertruck is a pug that eats hands.

But, pug breeders know what they’re doing. They’re aware that the dogs they breed will never be too great at the whole “breathing” thing, and that it doesn’t really matter because some specific genre of dog owner just loves that scrunched up face. Tesla engineers must have known too, right? How did that conversation go before launch? Stephen posed the question, and hoser68 answered it perfectly.

The real issue here was that Tesla engineers tested the anti-finger-chop sensors on themselves. They should’ve taken a page out of the book of another of Musk’s companies, and tested on something non-human before seeing the results and pausing to heavily retool their proces— oh, they just went right along with human trials? Okay. Maybe the Tesla engineers are just following procedure.


Congratulations, hoser68, on your Comment Of The Day win. Here’s a track about the signals from the Cybertruck’s sensors to its frunk motors, when it detects hands in the way of the lid.

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