Justice for This Australian Woman Driving Half a Hyundai Palisade

Steve DaSilva

March 20, 2023 at 6:30 PM·2 min read

This past Saturday, police in Victoria, Australia ticketed a woman for driving her Hyundai Palisade without a windshield, rear window, or any of the car’s typical front-end accoutrement — a hood, fenders, headlights, things of that nature. I, for one, think this woman did absolutely nothing wrong.

Look at it this way. You’re an established, 41-year-old woman. You’ve made it enough to get your hands on a new Palisade, so it’s likely you’re using the car as Hyundai intended: hauling around kids, dogs, or other assorted smaller living beings. You bought an SUV because you needed the space.

But does that mean you have to sacrifice your dreams of feeling the breeze on your face? I say no. Yet, with no three-row options on the market named “Wrangler” or “Bronco,” how are you supposed to get the wind in your hair on your commute, grocery run, or trip to the wreckers in search of new body panels?

There’s only one sensible solution, and it’s to smash out most — but not all — of your front windshield. In fact, take the rear out too. You need to consider the venturi effect, and how you’ll get all the hot air out of your car to allow cool, fresh air in from the front.

It’s basically a speedster! You can just picture someone behind the wheel of this Palisade, vintage driving goggles and gloves on, partaking in the Mille Miglia like the rest of the automotive world’s most well-to-do. And the Palisade should excel at it — with those front panels removed, not only has the car’s weight likely been reduced into superleggera territory, but the weight distribution has been moved further back for maximum rear-end grip.

The owner of this Palisade is clearly just an enthusiast, looking for the best performance and motoring experience out of her practical crossover. She’s not hurting anyone, she’s just making her commute a bit more enjoyable. Who doesn’t want that?