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The ten best ways to kill your car
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When it's clear your car is on its last legs you could send it off for crushing. Or you could have some fun. Here are ten techniques chosen by Jalopnik readers for disposing of your vehicle with a bit more flair than your junkyard can provide.
Welcome back to Answers of the Day — our daily Jalopnik feature where we take the best ten responses from the previous day's Question of the Day and shine it up to show off. It's by you and for you, the Jalopnik readers. Enjoy!
10.) Throw it in an industrial strength shredder
Suggested By: hexagonist
Why it's right for your vehicle: You could just hand your car over to the junkyard to be recycled, but you know your car deserves a more honorable death. Well, if you watch your car get churned into tiny little scraps by massive, all-consuming metal teeth, you'd agree that shredding is not very honorable. But if you hate that old car, it's a very satisfying form of destruction.
9.) Cannibalize it
Suggested By: IgotsmeaMetro
Why it's right for your vehicle: If you have multiple old cars in your driveway/garage/yard, you don't have the luxury of ripping the oldest one to shreds. Strip it of all its working parts and fit them to your other vehicles so that your fleet may live longer.
Photo Credit: Drew Stephens
8.) Melt it with a jet car
Suggested By: hexagonist
Why it's right for your vehicle: Finding a jet car could be difficult. You'll need to get to a county fair, unless the local squad of F-15s has some extra jet fuel they want to burn. Disposing of the charred remains of the vehicle will be a pain, but it'll be worth it to watch a stream of fire consume your hateful old hoopty.
7.) Incinerate it with a minigun
Suggested By: becaus3Porsche
Why it's right for your vehicle: This method is a little tricky, in that you'll likely need both a helicopter and a working minigun. If you don't already have them at your disposal, getting access will be difficult. That said, raining down burning destruction on your tired old car is worth the effort.
6.) Blow it up with a 25mm
Suggested By: hexagonist
Why it's right for your vehicle: It's much easier to get your hands on a 25mm chain gun, as they're basically standard equipment for Bradley fighting vehicles. In this video, you can see how some extra rounds can cause a junked car in the Iraq desert to actually explode.
