Yahoo Autos "We're Married And Live Four Blocks From Each Other": 17 People Shared The Unique Practices That Keep Their Relationship Healthy, And It's Super Eye-Opening
We recently asked members of the BuzzFeed Community to tell us about the unconventional rules or practices they follow in their romantic relationships. Their perspectives were all super interesting and unique, and though no two relationships operate the same way, it can be helpful to hear what works for other couples. Here's what people shared with us:
1."My wife and I will ask each other for 'cookies,' a sarcastic response to one of us wanting recognition for something minor. 'What, do you want a cookie or something?' Yes! Yes, I do! Sometimes I want recognition for shoveling the front walk. Sometimes she wants recognition for cycling through the dishes. Some days are really hard, and sometimes you really don't want to do the basics, so it's nice to have the little things recognized. We'll ask each other, 'Hey, can I have a cookie? I did XYZ,' and the other will genuinely express appreciation and recognition."
2."No large amounts of money in our joint account! 100% my rule because I have a major tendency to want to help others, as well as a shopping problem. I literally bought my sister a car, paid off her debt to the insurance company, and paid the first year in full. I had the funds to do so outright (prior to marriage), but I have yet to tell my husband ALL of the details on that, especially since my sister and I don't have a relationship anymore. He has a savings and a checking in his name, then we have a joint checking account. He transfers money over every week so I can grocery shop, get my coffees, and do stuff with our kids. Plus, I'm always able to ask for more if needed."
"I just know I'm the type who would sponsor a dolphin if someone asked me to, and we'd have no savings! My husband and I value open communication and have full access to each other's everything, minus me having access to the thousands upon thousands of dollars he's been able to save by me not having free, unsupervised access."
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—Anonymous
3."We never fight in the car or talk about loaded subjects in the car. My husband and I haven’t fought in a very long time, but that’s still a firm rule for us."
4."We don't sleep in the same bed every night. He's able to wake up when he wants in the mornings, even when I have to be at work early. We also both like to 'starfish', so we have separate beds and separate bedrooms. Often, one of us will cuddle/spend time in the other’s bed before going to theirs to sleep. We both sleep a lot better this way."
—Anonymous
5."My husband and I lived together the first five years of our marriage, and we nearly divorced. We have different organization and cleaning styles, and it was driving us nuts. Plus, he's an extrovert and regularly goes out with friends. I'm an introvert-extrovert. I go out with friends, but not often. Now, we live four blocks from one another, talk/text everyday, and make a concerted effort to make plans — from date nights to errands. We take turns spending the night. We've been doing this for five years (10 years married now), and it's helped us so much."
6."We say thank you to each other. Thank you for dinner, for taking the garbage out, etc. It might seem silly, but to us it’s genuine gratitude. It’s nice."
7."If we start to say something, we have to follow through and discuss it even though it might be a touchy subject. If we started to say it, it's obviously something we want to talk about, but might be afraid to say. It keeps us more open and honest with one another and has lead to some of the best talks we've had."
8."The house should be tidy for whoever is coming home to it. That doesn’t mean fully cleaned, but just tidy: a visually nice space for someone to return home to so they don’t feel compelled to do chores and can, instead, rest and relax. No coming home to chaos."
—Anonymous
