Would You Rather: 2024 Ford Mustang Dark Horse vs. 2024 GMC Canyon AT4X AEV Edition

Great news: You made it to the Wheel of Fortune bonus round and solved the puzzle. The category was What Are You Doing? and you shouted "Eating asparagus with Tony Danza!" to stunned applause. Pat Sajak flipped open the prize card, and there was a choice: 2024 Ford Mustang Dark Horse or 2024 GMC Canyon AT4X AEV Edition. Both cost in the mid-$60,000s range, and you could take your pick. So which would you rather drive home?

Both of these American badasses are the ultimate versions of their respective models. The Dark Horse is the most track-focused Mustang, with 500 horsepower and brakes to shame a Corvette Z06. The Canyon AT4X AEV Edition is one of the most off-road-capable vehicles on the market, with locking front and rear differentials, ultra-aggressive 34-inch Goodyear Wrangler Territory MT tires, and more underbody armor than an M1 Abrams. They're both great fun, but you'll need to give Pat a decision.

The Mustang clearly wins the under-the-hood contest, with its naturally aspirated 5.0-liter V-8 belting out 500 horsepower and a NASCAR soundtrack—even in the quiet mode, the active exhaust is still pretty loud. The GMC uses GM's turbocharged 2.7-liter four-cylinder, an engine that would win Truckiest Truck Engine of the Year from Truck-Engine Magazine, if any of that existed. It's powerful but unhappy, like the dictator of a cruddy country. Its 310 horsepower is okay, and its 430 lb-ft of torque impressive, but, like Hamlet's Player Queen, the Canyon's engine doth protest too much. The sound improves if you roll down the windows and introduce the pleasant scree of the turbocharger to the soundtrack.

You'd think that on pavement, the Mustang would be the better drive, but that's not always the case. On sunny, warm, days on smooth pavement, the Mustang Dark Horse is divine. In almost any other situation, it reminds you that it would rather be on a track. The Pirelli P Zero Trofeo RS tires are semi-slicks, hardcore track rubber that offers stupendous grip but provides no quarter for, say, rain. Or low temperatures. Or truck grooves in the road, which they will eagerly follow. On battered pavement, the Dark Horse's wheel squirms constantly as the front tires sniff out the ruts. If you want a friendlier Mustang, Ford will sell you a GT, but the Dark Horse is uncompromising. It doesn't relax.