Weird, wonderful and generally excellent used cars

Home is where dinner is, so it’s vital to get there in time. And what's the best way to do that? A stylish, great-value and specialised used car, of course.

We've employed bangernomics to find some real humdingers for every occasion.

Here are a few ways to make sure you're back before the sausages get cold, whether home is on the Côte d'Azur, in the darkest reaches of the snowy Highlands, or anything in between.

The sensible prestige open-top of choice has four rings and a dumpy body. The fully automatic roof takes just nine seconds to erect, plus it has extra insulation and a proper heated rear window, so perfect for frostier trips too. Clutch wear, steering racks, radiators and sensors can spoil the mood.

One we found: 2014 1.8 TFSI S Line, 56,000 miles, £13,489

There are few opportunities to enjoy a 12-cylinder convertible. What a spectacular present to give to yourself. The roof takes 19 seconds at road speeds of up to 30mph to open. The mechanism’s microswitches can fail. You can manually open and shut it, but that isn’t so dignified (and is best done when stationary).

One we found: 2013 6.0 W12, 118,000 miles, £35,000

Is this really a cabriolet? Doesn’t matter: the massive roll-back roof is a delight and keeps the handling in great shape. Not 100% in reliability terms, but prices are generally firm because it’s cute and popular. Niggly electricals and there can be rust underneath are the problems.

One we found: 2018 1.2 S, 30,000 miles, £10,250

Sporty Jaguars are going out of fashion (and production), but everyone would love one of these turning up outside. An F-Type will put a big smile on your face, plus the full-fat V8 is the most fun of all. However, timing chains can jump due to tensioner and guide failure.

One we found: 2018 5.0 V8 S, 50,000 miles, £27,999

There are times when you need to bring the family along. But don’t worry, the fully automatic hood is well lagged, so there’s no bother when it comes to the weather or noise, and there’s a ton of standard kit to keep everyone comfy. Beware of fuel pump failures and tired injectors.

One we found: 2014 E250 CDI AMG Sport, 70,000 miles, £12,990

Sheer driving pleasure is delivered in the great-value package that is (still) the Boxster. Every journey will be fun; just make sure you didn't plan on bringing the kids. Plentiful electrical niggles include ignition switch failure.

One we found: 2010 2.9 Sport Chrono, 64,000 miles, £16,950

These are now looking like a half-decent weekend toy (micro Batmobile, anyone?) and are on the cusp of going from great value to appreciating classic. That's reason enough to find one, provided it isn't neglected with engine bore wear, shot suspension and 23 previous owners.

One we found: 2000 1.9, 93,000 miles, £2000

The supermini is dead; long-live the best supermini that ever lived. Still great value, easy to fix and all you need to get you home. Fun to drive, too. Loads of spec options, but Zetec ticks most boxes, especially with air-con. Good things, small packages.

One we found: 2006 1.25 Zetec Climate, 102,000 miles, £695

The quality pseudo-mini cabbing saloon of choice. Picking up family fares and travelling significant distances when the buses and trains are having a festive rest is easy in one of these. Most importantly, it won't break down, and those Honda petrol engines are ULEZ friendly.

One we found: 2008 2.0 VTEC ES GT, 136,000 miles, £1900

Overlooked but cheap and unfashionably compact. Being a Jeep, it will get you out of a tight snowy spot but is fantastically plastic inside, with Christmas cracker-quality fittings. The Volkswagen Group-sourced 2.0 CRD diesel is unrefined but efficient. Limited specification is nothing of the sort.

One we found: 2008 2.4 Limited, 90,000 miles, £1995

Here's a two-door that's only a few inches short of the five-door hatch, so there's room for everyone inside, plus a bit of luggage. Even so, it wasn't very popular, because coupes need character. Lots of things to go wrong: avoid if the dash lights up like a Christmas tree. Otherwise worth the risk.

One we found: 2011 2.0 dCi Dynamique, 109,000 miles, £1695

The Eos has none of the kudos of the proper Golf Cabriolet yet does the same job much more cost-effectively, albeit with a daft name. It having a coupe-convertible folding roof affair at least gives you some weather flexibility. However, that massively complicated hood can cause problems.

One we found: 2008 1.4 TSI Sport, 98,000 miles, £1295

If there's a water hazard, there's eight-wheeled banana splits-style bathtubs are excellent. Will wade its way to homeward-bound glory, and if you need a boost, simply fit an outboard. There are 6x6 and 8x8 formats but only a 20mph top speed, so don't be in a hurry. Fabulously capable.

One we found: 2016 Argo Avenger 8x8, 3000 miles, £6500

Slight undertaker vibes, but mostly it resembles a Bentley Continental with a tailgate, which, usefully, takes part of the roof with it. Consequently, fitting a (insert big thing here) in the back isn't a problem. You can fill your boots with V8s, but the Mercedes-sourced diesel is the best option.

One we found: 2007 3.5 Lux, 117,000 miles, £3995

Doubtless, there are going to be times you might need to cross an ocean or two, and while most old Amphicars are rusted to bits, a fantastic plastic Dutton Surf has unbreakable Suzuki Jimny running gear. On land, there's no danger of getting stranded.

One we found: 2019, 40,000 miles, £23,500

Production vans with attitude are hard to find, but spotting a racing stripe Custom always gives you a lift in a haze of white panels. A crew cab is the perfect way to pick up relatives and all their luggage from the station. Some faulty turbos can spoil the fun.

One we found: 2018 2.0 280 EcoBlue Xclusive Sports Crew, 35,000 miles, £23,600

If you ever might need to take an as-the-crow-flies route home, get a tractor. The JCB 2135, made from 1998 to 2004, has four big wheels on 24in rims and a Perkins six-pot diesel making 135bhp so it will do 40mph - but that's all shortcuts, so your journey times will be halved.

One we found: 2001 2135, 8500 hours, £23,000

In effect a pregnant E-Class Estate. There's a slightly longer L-version too, but even the standard five-seater will take everyone and their holiday luggage with room to spare. Oh yes, and it's four-wheel drive so useful in the snow. Diesel is a common-sense purchase.

One we found: 2013 3.0 350L CDi, 75,000 miles, £10,995

These imports from Japan are actually quite delightful to drive, especially with that big Z-related V6 petrol engine. Chintzy chromework, plus there are some campervan conversions in circulation if you don't need eight seats. Nissan dependability is a boon.

One we found: 2020 3.5 camper, 30,000 miles, £22,500

Flying cars are fantasy? Apparently not. The three-wheeled Liberty looks like a Reliant Robin autogyro. It has folding rotor blades on the roof for lift and an engine-powered rear propeller for thrust; another engine gets it along the road. It takes 10 minutes to swap modes.

One we found: New, £425,000

A rather more car-like way to take to the air would be in Renault's 4-inspired drone. You could call it a quadrocopter if you want, but really this is a drone that you can sit on. It's a carbon fibre creation with an imaginary battery capacity that allows a 58mph top speed and a 700m altitude.

One we found: New, €4 million (and they’ll take Bitcoin)

You don't really want a boomy old van as a companion, especially when emptied of sound-absorbing jetsam. No, the standard people-carrier format is the best all-rounder and there are automatics and wheelchair-adapted options if you need one for an elderly relative.

One we found: 2010 Expression Automatic, 75,000 miles, £5500

More proof that you don't need a tractor from Chelsea to get home. Long before those things existed, here's a tiny flatbed Mini Moke on steroids that was a pukka all-terrain vehicle that kept farms and armies on the move. Shop in Europe for a decent choice.

One we found: 1968, 10k miles, £14,000

There are vans and there are Transporters, which are particularly comfortable vans. If you can't stretch to a California camper, the Combis make great parcel carriers. Watch out for oil and coolant leaks, plus smoky diesels.

One we found: 2015 2.0 BiTDI T32 Highline Combi, 46,000 miles, £28,995