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Ford F350, Baja 1000 Ford Bronco DR, Plymouth Scamp: The Dopest Cars I Found For Sale Online

Photo: Facebook Marketplace
Photo: Facebook Marketplace

Folks, happy Fourth of July. If there was ever a more perfect day for these slides, I don’t know it. The vehicles, the act of buying and selling, this slideshow is everything America stands for all rolled into one.

So grab a hot dog or burger, crack open a can of your favorite garbage beer (I recommend Genesee Red), and peruse the free-est listings you ever did see. Welcome to this week’s Dopest Cars.

1987 Ford F350 - $20,500

Photo: Facebook Marketplace
Photo: Facebook Marketplace

The two photos you’ve seen of this F350 are already incredible, but you truly need to click through to the ad to see the rest of it. The details, the interior, everything about this truck is absolutely perfect.

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I’d say this is a time capsule, but I honestly couldn’t tell you what time this is supposed to be from. The ‘90s is my first guess, but this could be a decade on either side of that and still fit in.

1985 Toyota 4Runner - $7,500

Photo: Facebook Marketplace
Photo: Facebook Marketplace

This, however, is a much clearer period piece. I think all cars should have these kinds of graphics down the side, done up in their automaker’s colors. Wouldn’t that be nicer to see in traffic?

BMW could do them in M colors, Subaru in gold on a blue body, and Toyota gets this perfect orange-red-dark red combo.

1979 International Scout II - $18,000

Photo: Facebook Marketplace
Photo: Facebook Marketplace

Not just a Scout, but a Scout in shockingly good condition. Not just a Scout in shockingly good condition, but one that’s got a nice-looking soft top rather than a hard roof. It’s perfect.

Sure, there’s some rust (and some even-more-questionable-looking rust “repair”) but you can fix that. It’s a long weekend this week, you’ve got all the time in the world to bust out the welder and some sheet metal. It’ll be fine.

1969 Dodge Dart - $28,500

Photo: Facebook Marketplace
Photo: Facebook Marketplace

Speaking of classic convertibles, this Dart looks like a fantastic way to cruise through summer. Throw the top down, pile your friends in the back, and listen to that engine rumble as you roll down the road.

The black leather interior will not be your friend on sunny days, but that’s fine. It’ll be worth it to have all this style at your disposal. Wear long pants or something.

2002 Ural Tourist - $6,000

Photo: Facebook Marketplace
Photo: Facebook Marketplace

If you need an only bike, do not buy a Ural with drum brakes. Parts on these are hard enough to get already. The seller of this particular bike, however, has some recommendations for who should buy it:

Do you hate:

- Tinder?

- Parking at a gas station (or literally anywhere) without getting engaged in immediate conversation?

- Going really fast?

- Polishing/waxing chrome?

This bike will solve all the above problems. If you put a dog in the sidecar with goggles (call them doggles for extra points) you will steal ANY gen Z chick right in front of her man. I don’t know what it is, something about being a historic/hipster/adventurer/Indiana Jones/problem solver turns the operator of this machine into a no cap dank BDE snack (as the kids say). Young men will want one but can’t get one, old men will respect you for respecting history and for some reason regale you with stories of their cousin who served in Vietnam. Everyone will literally take videos of you. It’s weird, but you get used to it.

I cannot vouch for the Gen Z mating potential of the Ural (aren’t zoomers still kids?) but I can absolutely confirm that people talk to you everywhere you go on one. It’s called the Ural Delay Factor, and it’s real.

2022 Ford Bronco DR - $500,000

Photo: Facebook Marketplace
Photo: Facebook Marketplace

C’mon, this one’s an easy Independence Day pick. What’s more American than ripping a giant Ford SUV through the desert for time, giant BF Goodrich tires slung on the back.

The Bronco DR, for Desert Racer, is designed for the Baja 1000. It’s got the suspension travel, the rollcage, every other modification you can imagine you could possibly want to go ripping through the dunes.

1999 Grumman Olson Bread Truck - $16,500

Photo: Facebook Marketplace
Photo: Facebook Marketplace

You’ve heard of vanlife, you’ve heard of converted skoolies, but what about living in a bread truck? Well, now you can, with this converted Wonder Bread-looking van.

The interior on this Grumman looks genuinely comfortable, with nice panels on the interior and even a wood-burning stove. Plus, this costs so much less than rent. Really, you can’t afford not to buy it.

1986 Toyota Land Cruiser FJ60 - $21,000

Photo: Facebook Marketplace
Photo: Facebook Marketplace

I know the FJ40 is the classic Land Cruiser that everyone actually wants, but allow me to make a case for the 60-series. You get a more comfortable interior, some slightly more modern amenities, and — I’ll say it — better looks.

The FJ40 is stubby, but the 60 has that nice long hood to balance everything out. It’s a great-looking generation of the Cruiser, and it goes underappreciated for its design.

1972 Plymouth Scamp - $14,500

Photo: Facebook Marketplace
Photo: Facebook Marketplace

For some reason, there are an absolute ton of neat classics for sale in Connecticut right now. Marketplace is absolutely full of them, and I can guarantee you that if you cruise along some state roads you’ll find more lining the driveways with For Sale signs in the windows.

Of course, not all those classics will be as nice as this Plymouth Scamp. It’s been worked over more than you might expect, with long-tube headers and a ported 318 engine, but I do have issues with the name. This is far too big a vehicle to be a scamp. A scamp is, like, a Lotus Elise.

1973 Honda CB350G - $3,500

Photo: Facebook Marketplace
Photo: Facebook Marketplace

This has to be one of the more beautiful things you can get for $3,500. The color, the tank design, the proportions, it’s just a gorgeous motorcycle. Honda had this all figured out in the 70s.

Click through to the ad for a startup video, but you don’t need to watch the start itself. Just look at how the paint glistens as the camera pans over it, how the metallic flake pops right into the lens. This is art.

1971 Chevy C20 - $9,000

Photo: Facebook Marketplace
Photo: Facebook Marketplace

You know the refrain, so sing along: Amber is a fan of old trucks, the more beat-up the better, and bonus points when they’re in faded pale tones. It’s not a surprise at all that this old C20 would find its way into these slides.

It doesn’t have working AC, the bed is rotted, the rocker panels need to be replaced, and it’s covered in a light film of rust. In other words, there is no better pickup truck on God’s green earth. I love it.

2016 Porsche Cayman GT4 - $125,000

Photo: Facebook Marketplace
Photo: Facebook Marketplace

Are you looking to get into track driving this summer? Well, you should probably start with something slower and cheaper than a Cayman GT4. Get yourself a Miata and come back in a few years.

Oh, hey, welcome back! How’s the year 2027 treating you? If this Cayman is still for sale, and you’ve built up the track day experience to not wreck a six figure car on your first lap, go give the Porsche a look. You’ve earned those dive planes.

1992 GMC Typhoon - $15,000

Photo: Facebook Marketplace
Photo: Facebook Marketplace

The GMC Typhoon is one of the coolest SUVs in history. I fully believe this, and you cannot convince me otherwise no matter how much effort you put in. Just look at it.

Sure, you don’t get the drop-top experience of a Blazer or Scout, but you do get the turbocharged V6 experience that’s unlikely to be matched in the modern world. See, we understand how to make turbos good now. Back then, we hadn’t quite nailed down the art. That’s character.

1969 Dodge Sportsman - $1,800

Photo: Facebook Marketplace
Photo: Facebook Marketplace

When an ad for a 55-year-old, $1,800 car opens with “Has RUST,” you know you’re in for something good. This Sportsman has seen better days, and I’m so glad it did.

How many paint colors are on this body? How many bits have been rusted through, replaced, and rusted through again? All cars eventually become ships of Theseus, and it’s heartening to know that folks are still there to fix them up and keep them on the road.

2016 Yamaha XSR900 - $6,800

Photo: Facebook Marketplace
Photo: Facebook Marketplace

Folks, I have been bitten hard and deep by the XSR900 bug. I want one of these retro-styled near-liter standards desperately. In fact, I want one so badly that this is not the best XSR900 listing I found in the past week. There’s a better one that I’m saving for myself.

This one, however, is pretty fantastic in its own right. That little windshield must be a massive benefit on the highway, and the seat — although noy my style in color or material — looks fantastic in silhouette above that rear wheel. It’s a good bike. Get it and match me.

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